Coleen Rooney must hope Netflix are joking about making a TV show of her “Wagatha Christie” plot to track down leaks about her.
Because she might not like how she is portrayed in it.
Keira Knightley has in jest “bagsied” the lead role – surely enough to make Coleen watch, if only through her fingers.
But Keira would need a bit of work in make-up to perfect the Scouse brow. And maybe she’d go and live in Croxteth for a month to pick up the accent?
Although, in my view, movie makers would be better off hiring Liverpudlian Killing Eve star Jodie Comer instead.
She is from just down the road and would nail the voice and appearance.
The potentially cringeworthy side of seeing someone imitate her is not the worst of it for Coleen.
Watching the drama unfold and what was behind her blaming Rebekah Vardy for leaking the personal stories, might be hardest to swallow.
Because whoever ends up playing Wayne Rooney’s wife will explore the age-old theme of cold, calculating revenge.
This is already much more than a fictional whodunnit gripping our nation. Even Americans have sat patiently while it was all explained to them.
Many have been impressed with Coleen’s detective work, forensically investigating stories and social media, even planting fake news. And all building up to the big reveal on Instagram: It’s… Rebekah Vardy’s account.
But compelling as it might be, my review of this thriller is a harsh one. I can’t believe Coleen has so publicly outed her fellow WAG, who says she is innocent, to millions of strangers.
Countless comments followed on Instagram, saying vile things about pregnant Rebekah.
Even if someone has betrayed you, trashing them so publicly is not remotely cool.
It makes you just as bad as them – if not worse. And this kind of social media shaming goes on every day away from the Wag circuit. But you can soon lose the upper hand – and the sympathy of your audience.
Sure, catch someone out, but be classy about making your point, especially as kids are involved on both sides. Rebekah has hit back, asking why Coleen didn’t speak to her, insisting someone else is responsible.
If I suspected a mate was betraying me, I’d meet face to face, show her my evidence, and ask for an explanation.
Not jump the gun and humiliate them. That just shows insecurity, immaturity and a plain nasty streak.
Who knows where this toxic Wag war will end? What might Rebekah come out with next, if she’s out for revenge?
There will be enough twists to come for TV series No2.
Until then, we’ll be tuned for a new real-life episode.
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